{"id":1877,"date":"2017-03-08T07:24:23","date_gmt":"2017-03-08T07:24:23","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.ourauthenticfamily.com\/?p=1877"},"modified":"2018-05-09T16:43:21","modified_gmt":"2018-05-09T16:43:21","slug":"moms-address-to-her-adopted-son-on-his-wedding-day","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.ourauthenticfamily.com\/index.php\/2017\/03\/08\/moms-address-to-her-adopted-son-on-his-wedding-day\/","title":{"rendered":"Mom\u2019s Address to Her Adopted Son on His Wedding Day"},"content":{"rendered":"

Babies are eagerly awaited and treasured and parental love grows from the very beginning. But what do you do when God chooses to start your family by giving you a broken, hurting, traumatized 6 year old to love and care for as your own son? Well, Dad\u00a0and I thought that love and fresh air would do the trick and that we would all live happily ever after just like any \u201cnormal\u201d family! And so, we naively decided to step into parenthood bringing you, our son, \u00a0into our home in July 1998. We had prayed much and felt led by God when we heard your\u00a0tragic story but we had absolutely no clue of the roller coaster ride we were in for.<\/p>\n

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\"our_adopted_kids\"<\/p>\n

You\u00a0came into our home knowing very little English \u2013 you were\u00a0from an entirely different background, religion and family than us. You\u00a0would just sit for hours staring outside your window in our home in NJ. You were\u00a0angry, frustrated and lied incessantly. When I tried to hug you, you\u00a0would stiffen and push me away. Our hearts broke as we heard your\u00a0tragic story of losing your\u00a0birth-mother, watching her as she had been pushed to die by setting herself on fire, being asked to step into the fire with her, as well as feeling the horror as you\u00a0could do nothing to help her be okay at the tender age of 5! You\u00a0were heartbroken and devastated and nobody had understood your\u00a0pain. You\u00a0hated me as I was replacing your\u00a0birth-mother. You would stubbornly refuse to obey anything that I asked you\u00a0to do. You\u00a0were failing in school and unable to logically think or function. Our family was held hostage to your\u00a0anger and failure. We looked like fools to our family and friends and we felt like we must be horrible parents to have a child as broken as you.\u00a0We put very strict boundaries around you\u00a0but it didn\u2019t seem to make a difference .\u00a0You just kept\u00a0getting worse with each passing year.<\/p>\n

\"kids\"<\/p>\n

I knew that Jesus was our only hope and often reminded you of verses like Romans 8:28 that “All things work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to His purposes<\/i>” \u2013 yet, even to me it felt empty and hopeless. You\u00a0hated God because in your mind, how could a loving God that we talked to you\u00a0about, allow\u00a0your mother to die so tragically without her knowing Him? We were hitting many walls and Dad and I often felt weary, angry and hopeless\u00a0\u2013 even ready to give up.<\/p>\n

I remember checking on\u00a0you several times each night. I would kneel by your bedside and sob asking God why? Why would He allow a little child to be hurt like this? Why was He not stepping in and helping us? Why? Why? Why? God\u00a0was our only hope and He needed to act soon.<\/p>\n

I would cling to the cross and sob singing this song by Mark Schultz.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n

I\u2019m down on my knees again tonight,<\/em>
\nI\u2019m hoping this prayer will turn out right.<\/em>
\nSee, there is a boy that needs Your help.<\/em>
\nI\u2019ve done all that I can do myself<\/em>
\nHis mother is tired,<\/em>
\nI\u2019m sure You can understand.<\/em>
\nEach night as he sleeps<\/em>
\nShe goes in to hold his hand,<\/em>
\nAnd she tries<\/em>
\nNot to cry<\/em>
\nAs the tears fill her eyes.<\/em><\/p>\n

Often late at night I watch him sleep,<\/em>
\nI dream of the boy he\u2019d like to be.<\/em>
\nI try to be strong and see him through,<\/em>
\nBut Jesus, whom he needs right now is You.<\/em>
\nLet him grow old,<\/em>
\nLive life without this fear.<\/em>
\nWhat would I be<\/em>
\nLiving without him here?<\/em>
\nHe\u2019s so tired,<\/em>
\nAnd he\u2019s scared<\/em>
\nLet him know that You\u2019re there.<\/em><\/p>\n

Can You hear me?<\/em>
\nAm I getting through tonight?<\/em>
\nCan You see him?<\/em>
\nCan You make him feel all right?<\/em>
\nIf You can hear me<\/em>
\nLet me take his place some how.<\/em>
\nSee, he\u2019s not just anyone, he\u2019s my son.<\/em><\/p>\n

But, God appeared to be silent. No answers, no explanations, no comfort. The only answer I got was a promise from Him on May 12th, 2002 from Isaiah 54<\/strong>:\u00a0O afflicted one, storm-tossed and not comforted, behold\u2026\u2026All your children shall be taught by the Lord, and great shall be the peace of your children. In righteousness you shall be established; you shall be far from oppression, for you shall not fear!<\/b><\/em>\u00a0I needed faith to believe! Eleven long years went by before we saw God fulfilling this\u00a0promise to me. In August 2009, God in a miraculous act of grace broke through to you my son, and let His light shine through. He even wiped away your\u00a0anger and healed\u00a0your broken mind, spirit and soul!<\/p>\n

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You are\u00a0now twice adopted \u2013 once into our family and adopted a second time into God\u2019s family. You\u00a0now have eternal hope, peace and joy with Jesus!<\/strong><\/p>\n

Life has not been easy my son – I grieve deeply for I did not have you physically with me the first six tender years of your life and then I did not have you emotionally and spiritually the next eleven years because of your trauma. You have been learning to love and care for us step by step, in just the last few years. You know that Dad and I love you dearly through the bad times and the good times, and we are extremely grateful to God for you. Your sisters love you so much too. You have loved your family well!\u00a0Dad and I have loved you deeply but we’ve also failed you much. Our hope has only been Jesus – that in our weakness, He shines strong. We hope that you will forgive us of our mistakes and sins against you but that you will take the good and carry on the godly heritage that you have received.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n<\/div>\n

\"IMG_1171\"<\/p>\n

And now God is calling you to fly and build your own home with this lovely\u00a0young lady whom He chose and brought into your life. We rejoice at the good gift that your loving Heavenly Father has gifted you with in your wife, our precious daughter-in-love. Our constant prayer for you both is that you will fully surrender your lives to Jesus and live honoring and loving Him with all your heart, mind, soul and strength. Nothing on earth is worth more than Jesus!<\/p>\n